Hello everybody... yes I'm only back for a while and it is only enough for a couple of things, including posting this entry. So i guess that there's much to talk about. Too many things, too little time...

Anyway, as some of y'all know, my 'O' Levels are over a long time ago. Though this may be the case, I'm still feeling a little nervous. Firstly, I'm scared about my results. Secondly, I'm still jobless. And third,  It has been a long time since I hang out with my friends! You can say that I am growing anxious with nothing to do, too much free time and overall, no leisure activity that I can do. Well, i don't count watching movie marathons at home as a leisure activity, but at least there's something to do right.

I am currently jobless (in some ways), but i do get paid for  singing in my dad's pop band and karaoke events. However, the pay couldn't last me two days! But it's my dad... I cant just retaliate right. Besides, my mom taught me to accept anything that is given to me, and I'm doing just that...

talking about karaoke... we just had one last sunday, at Bikit Batok West and it was (how weird it is) amazing. i could actually sing songs that i couldn't at home! One of which is 'Dua Insan' (Two Souls) by Ezad and Eva and 'Gadis Melayu'(Malay Woman) by Jamal Abdillah... these were the songs I had problems with during practice and I tackled it during the real thing! WOW! looks like i'm gonna tarin more... besides, Singapore Idol is around the corner and I can't wait for the auditions this february.

anyway, after the event, I went for 'Ikhlas' held at the Mediacorp studios and it was fun! I can't believe my idol waved at me. She's none other than the Queen of Malay Pop, SITI NURHALIZA!!! Honestly speaking, she looked quite dazzling-ly tall from where I was sitting. Unfortunately, I was at the top gallery- what do you expect, the cheapest ticket i could get my hands on. Anuar also went for the concert, and I feel like killing him. He got transfered to the lower gallery from the top gallery! But i can't blame him. He just got lucky. Actually, almost all of the seats nearer to the door got transferred down. So guess what, I also transferred myself nearer to it. However, my luck ran out and I was stuck there for the whole sixty minutes that was left. But it's ok. The thing is Siti waved at me, and I shall not forget it. and after the show, i met Khairil Yusoff of Anugerah. Though i was not interested for his autograph and pic, i did say that Azhar kirimkan salam kat dia. and he replied... I told azhar already about this... hey, what are friends for right...

anyway, after watching the show, i somehow promised myself that i will try hard and practice hard to prepare myself for the SI auditions so that i can at least make it into the dressing rooms of mediacorp studios and bring up my family name. All i need is a little motivation from my loved ones and people that i know and someday, i will succeed... man that's long! anyway, it's goodbye for now... wish me luck!

Wow! I can't believe that the 'O' Levels are getting nearer and nearer. It will only take a few more days before my first paper, well, actually just now was my first paper, after a very long time. Now that I've finished my Biology practical, I can look forwards to my other papers. But I'm also equally scared. What if I cannot handle the pressure? What if I have a nervous breakdown on the day of the exams? TOUCH WOOD! I can't be saying that! I should be calm and steady... maybe with my average pass for my Prelims, I can make use of it as a motivation to work even harder. I managed to pass my combined humanities... Alhamdulillah!

Anyway, I hope that with this final hurdle, I am able to find a happy life after my Secondary school life. Although I know that I'll be missing the bitter-sweet memories, I should think of it as a blessing, not a curse. From secondary school, I am I am a totally changed person from what I was in primary school. To all my friends, I'll be missing y'all... and hopefully, we could have frequent 'get-togethers' in times to come next year (*sobx*)... I LOVE Y'ALL!

So, good luck to all my friends who are taking 'O' Levels with me and may our future endeavours be as bright as the sun may shine, and be happy always. Kepada para Muslimin and Muslimah, Selamat menunaikan ibadah puasa and selamat Hari Raya maaf Zahir dan Batin. Wasallam. Take care y'all!

Hello! Welcome again to my blog. Phew! My Preliminary Exams are over and I'm here to celebrate, cyber-ly I mean. So anyway, the topic that I'm going through today is about betrayal. For the record, I'm not writing this just because I've been betrayed, me and my people around me are all ok.

Yipee... it's good to be bloggin' again... How long has it been? months? Sorry guys for not being able to read new entries from me becos I have no internet access... even now! I'm at my cuz, so bear with me ok.

So anyways, my life has been a tumultous journey, what with the good i had, the friedships I los (and broke), the stress I experienced, the euphoria in my life, and of course, the bad times I had. it was indeed ming-boggling goin' through these times. so what am I goin' to talk about. Today's topic is simple- Friendship!

In the previous paragrapgh, I stated of the 'friendships I lost (and broke)'. That I have to say taught me a lesson- not to take advantage of your FRIENDS. An example of a friendship that I carelessly broke was between someone some of you know (if these 'some people' understand who I'm talking about... then good). Here's a hint, we used to be such close friends and we've worked together in something. I've known HIM for a few years and have shared treasured moments together. If you're still clueless on who is this 'HE' I'm talking about, then just play along.

So anyway, the friendship was all lost due to a simple mistake I made and an involvement from a third party. I started to avoid him after the incident and look what it got me into now. I've shed tears and nights of sleepless nights, anger, pain and sorrow, discreet and loneliness, heartbreaking madness, I've tasted it all, just for one person. I may sound gay, but honestly, that's how much I treasured our frindship. Well, now that's all lost, I have no power to turn back time, so I just have to live with it, don't I?

Ok, so anyway, the message that I'm trying to bring across is this- never take advantage of your friendship. If you really are attracted to someone as a friend, share your thoughts, secrets and opinions together. DO NOT involve a third party, and if you do, YOU'RE DEAD! Friends are like diamonds, you can't make them, but you need to Find them. Remember, every step you take, every move you make and every breath you take with that particular friend, treasure, pleasure it, cherish it.

Ok, that's all for today. Hope I'll be bloggin' soon. Byex!

Hello once again. Welcome to my blog. Sorry i did not blog for a while as I did not have the time to do so. Anyway, thanks to Aaron who kindly tagged on my tag board as he had recently discovered my blog. Thanks for the comment. I hope today's entry would make another good read to you.

Anyway, my topic for today is about the 'Affairs of the Heart'. People, please do not get it confused with a previous post (Love at first Sight?) of mine. This topic explores deeper into one's heart, in particular, mine. Some of you will begin asking, why am I writing about the affairs of my heart? Don't get me wrong. Blogs are meant for individuals around the world to express their thoughts, feelings, memories whatsoever- and I am doing as such. So let's begin, shall we?

I have decided to talk/ write about this topic as me and my friend had just had this conversation last night. I shall not mention his/her name as I do not want to interfere his/her privacy.

To start of, let me explain what it is meant by the phrase, 'Affairs of the Heart'. I am sure that all of us know what Love is, right? Then infatuation? Eventhough I am not quite sure of what infatuation means, I do know that both Love and Infatuation is something realted to the Affairs of The Heart.

Last night, me and my friend had this conversation, which was somehow can also be called as confessions of our souls. We confessed to each other of who each of us really fell in love with and how high our level of infatuation towards that particuler admiree of ours. Fortunately, both of us love different individuals. We even talked about the other people who we'd want to have if the ones that we truly love is not interested towards me and him/her. Confused? Don't worry- me too. Anyway, unfortunately, some of our reserved adnirees happened to be the same. Still confused? But we don't really care as much as we have not really know whether the relationship might work out with our own admirees.

Hola! Welcome again to my blog. Hope you enjoy the video which I have just uploaded.

Anyway, this week's topic is about "Love At First Sight", or in shot, "Love Crushes". I decided to talk about this this week after what a close friend of mine had shared with me a problem he faced that is related to the topic. I will not elaborate on it because I respect his privacy.

So. Another Love-related topic. Crushes usually occurs in many of us. It's a natural phenomena that we encounter in our daily lives. This is especially happen oftenly to those who are undergoing puberty. During this period, we begin to produce some kind of hormones that make us feel attracted to somebody, that includes me. I used to have a lot of crushes. You can ask any of my close friends and they would agree with me. Guess that I produced to much of the hormone. Ha-ha!

So anyway, now everything has changed. I know that I would not get any girls that I admire in school, due to my appearance. Besides, the Big 'O' Levels are coming and it is better that i set my mind on it. That was one of the reasons why I stopped having crushes. Another is due to the fact of what happened to my close friends. He kept having crushes. Luckily for him, he is at least physically attractive, and it's no surprise that he managed to have 'steadies'.

So anyway. now I'd like to discuss the pros and cons of having crushes. Let's start with the advantages...

Advantages

Hello again. Ya I know that one week is not up yet as I said in my previous entry that I'll be blogging again next week. But since I get to surf the net now, why not I blog again, right?

Anyway, the topic for today is 'Love'. Love is defined (as according to www.yourdictionary.com)-

1. A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness.
   
2. An intense emotional attachment, as for a pet or treasured object.
   
3. A person who is the object of deep or intense affection or attraction; beloved. Often used as a term of endearment.
   
4. An expression of one's affection

Or what we all know as, feelings to an individual, mainly of the opposite sex. Love comes in two categories: Family Love and Love Divine (feelings towards another individual out of family ties).

Let's look at Family love first. Love in the household is very beneficial to the family. It usually makes what a family is. If there's a lot of Love going around the household, then we can safely say that the whole family is a joyful and caring bunch (like the Brady Bunch). But if there's lack of family love, then we can say that the family ties are unstable. Fights and arguments tend to occur due to different views of different individuals in the family, leaving a sense of loneliness and outcast-try towards and individual.

The elders in the household is the main factor that contributes to family love. They are usually the ones whom the younger ones will look up to. They (the younger ones) would follow their habits (both good and bad). In order for them to be able to live happily is when everyone listen to each others views. Being the elder ones, they should listen to the younger ones before taking action. If this does not happen, then misunderstanding and misconceptions will occur. So listen people, we should all listen to one another.

Now let's talk about Love Divine. Love nowadays are going about more freely. Love Divine is love showing feelings towards another individual. Another word to describe Love Divine is Romance. It usually occurs when we are attracted to an individual as he/she possesses a certain personality/ charm/ charisma that we admire. When we develop feelings to that individual, we will often find time to spend with him/ her and we try to get to know the person better. For me, Relationships occur in three stages. The first stage is the basic one: Friendship. It never occurs that a couple starts to Love each other without knowing each other well. Through Friendship, the sense of being similar and knowing one another is the main factor that shapes a love-life. Then, after Friendship, comes Love. In this stage, the individual get to really show their feelings to that individual and vice versa. But this stage also determines the level of committment between the couple. If they think that it could work out (the relationship), then, they'll proceed on to next level, but if not, they will break up and start from scratch with someone else. For those who survives Love, they will go on to 'Infatuations and Ringing Bells'. Infatuations is the extravagance of passion or attraction. This is the part where couples couldn't bear to part from each other. with that, Ringing Bells will come in. This is where they will get married.

Besides the three stages, there's another stage. It's the Family stage. This is where factors that leads to a happy family of a divorce will occur. This stage is usually categorize under 'Family Love' which I have mentioned above. So it is important for people to love one another- Family, friends, neighbours strangers. If this world is filled with Love, then I guess we will all live joyfully (with exception of crimes).

So that's all for today. Once again, Thank you for taking time to read this. Bye!

Hello again. I'm back blogging for the next topic. This week, I'm going to touch on Homosexuality. Yes I know that this is such a sensitive issue but it made me kept thinking about it after reading this article about ita few days back.

Homosexuality is defined as an act towards the opposite sex by an individual. It is comonly termed "Gay" for men and "Lesbians" for women. Nowadays, there has been a rising number of homosexuals, especially in men. In Singapore, the number of AIDS cases has risen in the Gay and Lesbian Community, especially in the Gay community.

In a recent article, about a few days back (The New Paper), it reads that men are more involved in gay activities at party bashes and so on. What intrigues me is that there were a big group of 10-12 men having sex openly! It happened in 2000 at the Annual Spring Party held at Sentosa. According to the report, these men were usually high on drugs and alcohol. As we all know, drugs and alcohol, when consumed, can make an individual less responsive to the environment. Can you imagine, it was your first time attending such parties, and once you enter the party area, you're greeted by a sight of a group of men performing oral and anal sex right before your eyes? If it were to happen to me, I'd say that I would never ever attend such parties again.

Yes I know that being Gay is not wrong as it's up to the individual whether he wants to be gay or not. But for God's sake, try to keep it low profile. Ok. Let's say your a gay/lesbian, would you go around teling and showing people that you're one? Ok. If you and your Gay partner are attracted to one another, then have your business somewhere private, a motel a room or something. But please, not in public!

Anyway, what i have studied about this problem is that homosexuality arises as the homo-individual is usually lonely, thus they cling on whoever friends they have. Being humans, we usually hang on with friends of the same gender. After a long while, he/she may develop feelings towards the friend thus homosexuality occurs. The individual will try to spend more time with the friend as he/she could not bear to part from the so-called "friend". That is why, it is encouraged for people to mingle with friends of the two sexes so that the chance of homosexuality to occur is low.

Ok. I admit. I used to have feelings for someone of my same gender. But i soon realize that having these feelings will just break me. So, that is why for those who know me, I prefer hanging out with both girls and boys because I know that this is the only way that i can develop feelings for the opposite sex. (Ps please do not tease me because of this)

So to all those who are involved in these homosexual activities, my advice is for you to keep as low-profile as possible because I know, if people finds out of who you really are, you'll start losing your dignity and pride.

So people, thank you once again for taking time to read my blog, and hope you'll check in again next week for the next topic. This has been Khairul "Ayul" As'ari, good day!

Good day everyone. From now on, when i blog, I will discuss about topics that I would think of. For today, my topic is "What happens in the after-life?"

I'm bringing this up today beacuse this morning, I was playing badminton with my relatives. It happens to be that there was this post-funeral thing that was happening under one of the blocks nearby. I did not see a coffin so my guess is that probably the deceased has been buried or cremated. The deceased was a Chinese man as what is shown on the picture a young lady was holding. My guess is she is the deceased's daughter. Do you know how i get to give some details? It was because I was cycling nearby so I got a chance to see who, what and why is happening down there.

So anyway, there were a few others around her.  There is this monk who says out prayers and ring this bell, while the rest followed with his prayers. It took quite some time to finish as i was there observing the ritual. Then I saw these paper structures that made me question myself. The structures were of a Car, a house and other luxury such as a radio and jewellery. I understand that the Chinese belive that these structures, when they are burnt, they will be sent up to heaven for the deceased who they strongly believe where the deceased would be. I asked myself, is it really necessary for them to do so? Heaven is the place where we all want to be in when we die as what we heard from different religious increments is that heaven is filled with all the luxury and happiness. Heaven fills one's soul  joy, pleasure and happiness.

An opposing idea of doing so is that we do not really know whether the deceased would make it to heaven or not. He could end up in hell? Only god knows. Sorry to the Chinese people for me being inconsiderate here. But according to my opinion, all this burning of paper structures which they believed is a necessity, is all just not the right way to do it. Happiness in Heaven is all up to the Almighty God or in this case, according to my religion, Allah. Face it, if you "deliver" these so called "luxury" up to the Heavens, wouldn't it be inconvenient to the souls in Heaven to be handling all the stuff. I believe that the environment up there is somewhat similar to what it is like down here. Just look at reality. When we have cars, we have to pay taxes, instalments or whatever it is we call it. Then, houses. Who knows? Maybe there is not enough "land" for the souls to build the House we "sent" them. Jewellery, what's the use of wearing them in Heaven? It would show that the soul could be self-centred and thus it could made them be thrown into Hell.

I am not being criticisive here. But what I am stating asre to what i Believed. So once again, I apologize to those who are againts my opinion. It is not that this is a form of Bribery for you to convert to my religion, but it is to show what i think of other religions, and yet, I still respect the practices of other religions.

That's it for this week, so watch out for next week or so and I will discuss of another topic. Thank You!